Love is in the air, because tomorrow is February 14th! Valentine’s Day! The Day of Love! … or Single’s Awareness Day! Or to the more counterbalanced individuals among us, it may just be Thursday! Regardless of the holiday you find yourself celebrating tomorrow and who you are celebrating it with, be it a boyfriend, girlfriend, a single friend, or group of friends, cat, dog, fish, hamster, or, as it is commonly referred to as nowadays, being “forever alone” (cheers!) this time of year raises the questions, concerns, (and hormones,) of many a college student in regards to the universal favorite topic of sex and relationships.
Let me begin by disclaiming that I will sound like a broken record repeating a lot of the same information pounded into your head many a time already, but that is because our buddy Cupid over here fires his arrows and bolts, never sticking around for the fallout that sometimes carries over from careless actions that college kids falsely believe they are immune from. At the risk of sounding like the ageing RA that sternly wags his finger at you, I have seen it time and time again. So, I decided to team up with our beloved winger archer and tie some helpful hints to the arrows you may find yourself prodded with this year.
Cupid’s Arrow #1: Meet the Ugly Green Monster’s Equally as Ugly Relative
Sometimes, students come into college with very little or no experience about their sexuality, so when they hear their friends and peers boasting about their latest sexual conquests the night prior, they may get trailed upon by that obnoxious brute called Peer Pressure.
Before we even begin to dive in further here, let me just stop and give a friendly piece of advice: Never Force Anything. Attempting to force friendships usually does not get you very far, attempting to force relationships usually is a sign Cupid had a bit of a cockeyed shot, and attempting to force sex just finds you in a whole world of hurt, both ethically and legally.
Unquestionably, we all desire for connection and intimacy, but that should not encourage you to force anything just because “everyone else is doing it.” Mistakes derived from peer pressure can have some unsatisfying and regretful consequences attached with them. Case in point: a very good friend of mine was on a bit of a sexual dry spell, and after a bit of peer pressure from a few of his teammates, he had sex with a girl that he hardly knew and had zero connection with. The next morning, he felt extremely embarrassed over his hasty decision and was ashamed with himself, not to mention it managed to destroy a friendship between him and one of his other friends who actually knew the girl.
At the end of the day, it really is okay to take things slow and do things your own way, regardless of what your peers around you say or think. Dr. Seuss said it best when he said, “People who mind don’t matter, and people who matter don’t mind.”
Cupid’s Arrow #2: Welcome to College, Where the Hormones Rage (As Do the Risks)
Okay, so college is all about meeting people, and sometimes these connections create friendships, and sometimes they develop into something more, and when this happens, clothes tend to come off. College kids are notoriously bad at thinking, however, that not practicing safe sex is still okay because y’all are 17-22 years old and immortal. However, you aren’t.
Sure, I understand sex feels better without a condom, but I know that it also is not worth an unplanned pregnancy or even contracting an STD or AIDS. This day and age, we are lucky as young adults to have the widest variety of condom choices, including thin condoms that still feel great and keep you protected.
Also, guys and girls, always have condoms around ready for use. Nowadays, you can buy condoms that come in small safety packets that keep the condom safe from elements such as heat, being crushed or ripped, or anything else that would weaken most other condoms. This way, you can keep them in your wallets, purses, in the glove box of your car, or in the sock drawer back home. Then, they are always willing and ready to go, just like you!
Cupid’s Arrow #3: Person A Meet Person B
By no means is any piece of relationship advice sound and foolproof for every couple in the entire world, because we are all different and we tend to all interact and love others in unique ways. Therefore, in this regard, I have very little advice to give if you are already in a relationship, because you discover what works and does not work as a couple on your own. However, I do have this: Communicate.
Communication is still how this world works, the last time I checked. Distance undoubtedly puts a massive strain on any relationship, especially those couples at two different colleges across the country/globe. So be sure to communicate with one another, and trust what the other is saying. Same goes for you couples who attend the same college. Communication is still just as vital. And for those of you single, you know what, that’s cool too. College is a great time to find your groomsmen, not necessarily your wife.
Have a Happy Valentine’s Day!